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May
2002 Newsletter
Issue Five, Volume Three
THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS
By Mike Gasior
I know that I have lamented many times in months
past that there seemed to be so many stories worth talking about,
and so little newsletter space to dedicate to covering them. I have
also gotten a few notes over the years that my newsletters can run
too damn long. For these reasons I am going to try giving brief
coverage to a bunch of subjects rather than extensive coverage to
a few so this issue is a full 2.77% shorter than usual. Let me know
what you think.
Before I do anything else, I’d like to offer
an apology to my Irish friends around the world. I try very hard
not to be too “American” with regard to being painfully
ignorant concerning matters outside the borders of the U.S., but
even I occasionally slip up. This particular mistake is especially
embarrassing since I truthfully know, and knew better, having actually
worked for one of the largest U.K. banks. Still, I referred to the
situation regarding the trading losses at Allied Irish Bank as having
happened to “another U.K. bank”. Needless to say, Ireland
is a proud and independent republic, and I knew that, which makes
the error worse. In a few of the pubs I frequent around the world
this sort of mistake would most certainly have earned me a punch
in the mouth, and rightfully so. So I extend my apology and clarification
to everyone who might have been ticked off over this.
Now onward and upward to this month’s treasure
trove of “quickies”.
CLUB FED
I was frankly surprised that so many readers felt
I was way off base when I predicted that not a single person from
Enron would end up going to jail over that whole fiasco. Not surprisingly,
hardly anyone disagreed with my prediction that the weasel politicians
wouldn’t do a damn thing to change the system, which allowed
it to happen in the first place.
Here are my facts for why I think no one from Enron
will spend even a weekend in jail. I hope these statistics surprise
you too, but you also know I like to back my feelings up with facts.
--In the ten years between 1992 and 2001 the SEC
brought civil charges in something just shy of 10,000 cases. The
SEC felt strongly enough about 609 cases to refer to the U.S. Attorneys
Office to pursue criminal charges and indictments.
--Of the original 609 criminal referrals, 187 of
them were prosecuted.
--Of the 187 prosecutions, 142 of those were found
guilty.
--Of the 142 guilty people, 87 of those actually
went to jail.
--338 of the cases never resulted in anyone being
charged with a crime.
--84 of the cases are still pending an outcome
of some kind.
--Since 1985 the white-collar prison population
has dropped from 2.8% of total inmates to 0.6%, and it continues
to drop.
I complained in previous issues that it made me
sick to my stomach to watch these politicians pounding their fists
onto tables and thumping their chests about the “outrage”
of all these financial scandals. “How could this have happened?”
they asked.
I’ll explain to you EXACTLY how these scandals
were allowed to happen, and these politicians shouldn’t be
even a little surprised since they literally caused the whole thing.
Period. Paragraph.
Since the Securities and Exchange Commission is
supposed to be safeguarding investors you might think that Congress
would want to make sure they had enough resources to get the job
done, but they haven’t been given those resources. In fact,
the Congress has been using the SEC as a profit center for the government.
Examine the following numbers for yourself and see what you think.
--In 2001 the SEC took in revenues of $2,522,000,000.
--In 2001 the politicians gave the SEC a total
operating budget of $413,000,000 which is just a little over 16%
of the revenue they brought in.
--In 2001 the politicians added the other $2,109,000,000
to the account of the U.S. Treasury.
--In 2002 the politicians wonder why there isn’t
adequate surveillance of U.S. financial markets by the SEC. You
explain to me how these people get elected since they must clearly
be complete idiots.
RUNNING OUT OF OPTIONS
Almost two years ago I suggested that the time
had come for companies to finally begin accounting for stock options
given to insiders. In February, Senator John McCain (Republican
from Arizona) and Senator Carl Lavin (Democrat from Michigan) introduced
a bill titled “Ending the Double Standard for Stock Options
Act” which would have forced companies to begin accounting
for these options in a realistic and transparent way.
The current accounting rules defy any common sense
and when I try to explain them to logical people, I know they are
thinking that I must be making it all up.
Here is a quick reminder of how the current rules
allow companies to account for the options they grant employees
and how this inflates earnings:
--XYZ Company gives an executive a stock option
with a value of $1.00
--XYZ Company is then allowed to deduct the $1.00
value of the option from their tax bill.
--XYZ Company doesn’t have to take the $1.00
value of the option as a business expense, however.
--Since XYZ Company had tax savings of $1.00 this
directly increases their earnings even though there was no actual
cash laid out by the company to enjoy this deduction.
All the McCain/Lavin proposal would require is
that when companies decide they would like to continue to take the
tax deduction they must also treat the option as an expense, which
would negate the earnings increase. Simple. Accurate.
Companies began to immediately line up to oppose
the new law, with even bitter rivals standing shoulder to shoulder
aligned against it. I will be the first to admit that it’s
difficult to blame these companies. As recently as the year 2000
just five companies managed to increase their earnings by $6 billion
using this exact accounting technique. (Those companies were Microsoft,
Intel, Cisco, AOL Time Warner and Dell)
I’ll be keeping my eyes open to see if the
politicians do the right thing here or cave to the lobbying pressure.
Stay tuned.
PULL THE TRIGGER
Another troubling turn of events traces it’s
roots back to the recent failure of several companies. Suddenly
the rating agencies are becoming more athletic regarding downgrades
of a company’s credit ratings before the financial situation
becomes dire. Both Moodys and S&P are currently taking grief
from Congress because both seemed too slow to notice Enron’s
and others weakening financial condition which cost investors billions
of dollars in losses. This is causing both agencies to move much
more quickly to reduce the ratings on the bonds of some companies.
The troubling thing is that in recent years many
companies have attached ratings “triggers” to some of
their bond issues. These triggers allow investors to “put”
the bonds back to the issuing company, or they might force certain
significant financial improvements in the company to satisfy creditors
if the bonds rating falls to a “junk” level. This exact
sort of trigger came close to sinking K-Mart over five years ago,
but apparently only postponed the inevitable.
There are currently a bunch of companies whose
ratings are teetering a little too close to junk bond status and
a few could end up hurting pretty badly if their bonds are downgraded.
Here is the quick list of companies, which have bonds outstanding
with a ratings trigger. The dollar number I quote is the size of
the debt which has a “trigger” attached to it and I
also mention how close this debt is to junk status currently.
AT&T - $10,000,000,000 – Currently 3
ratings above junk
El Paso - $2,000,000,000 – Currently 2 ratings above junk
Williams Companies - $1,400,000,000 – Currently 2 ratings
above junk
Georgia Pacific - $1,400,000,000 – Currently 1 rating above
junk
Halliburton - $700,000,000 – Currently 2 ratings above junk
AT&T Canada - $100,000,000 – Already junk
There are many more companies with similar ratings
triggers being held to their heads, although many are trying to
refinance their current debt issues with new issues without triggers.
I view this as just another troubling economic cloud on the horizon.
HOT OFF THE PRESS
These statistics were just released this week in
the U.S.:
--Personal income increased 0.3% in April
--Personal spending increased 0.5% in April
--Both the U.S. Treasury and many states report
sharply decreasing tax revenues from income and capital gains taxes.
This is one of a thousand reasons I don’t
believe for a minute that the economic recovery is well underway.
This sort of behavior by consumers is unsustainable and will only
worsen the debt load they are under which is already at record levels.
I beg you to remember that these same ding-a-lings who are telling
you the recovery has begun are the same dopes that never saw the
recession coming in the first place. Why in the heck would you ever
listen to a single thing they say?
JUST A LITTLE WALL STREET GOSSIP
Truthfully, this story is not much of a secret
on Wall Street, but I haven’t found it getting much mainstream
press and wanted to share it with you.
Earlier this year word began to leak out that the
New York Stock Exchange (NYSE) was seeking to acquire the American
Stock Exchange (ASE). Both of them have even admitted to having
some preliminary merger discussions.
People have wondered why the NYSE would be interested
in the ASE since the ASE only handles about 3% of U.S. trading volume
in stocks. What many don’t know, however, is that the ASE
is the second largest options exchange in the U.S. after the Chicago
Board Options Exchange (CBOE). On top of that, the ASE is the biggest
marketplace for the trading of Exchange Traded Funds (ETF).
Perhaps best of all for the NYSE is the prospect
of using the ASE as a testing ground for new trading systems and
new products on a smaller scale before rolling the out at the “Big
Board”.
Currently, the National Association of Securities
Dealers (NASD) owns the ASE and any acquisition would need their
approval.
NEXT TIME MAYBE INVISIBLE INK
Just last week England introduced the brand new
five pound note which was supposed to be much more difficult to
counterfeit since it contains a foil hologram and a metallic thread
imbedded in it.
Unfortunately the Bank of England began getting
phone calls from people who said that the serial number on the note
would simply rub off with your finger under the slightest pressure.
The Bank of England is currently recalling the
new currency because of this erasable ink problem and has stated
that there are currently plenty of the old notes floating in circulation
and there is no need for concern.
I TELL YOU TO LISTEN TO WARREN BUFFETT
LAST MONTH AND NOW THIS?
Last month I tell you that one of the few people
who I would ever listen to regarding anything they say about investments
was Warren Buffett. While Mr. Buffett’s comments weren’t
about anything regarding investments, his words struck me like a
ton of bricks.
Regarding the possibility of a nuclear attack occurring
in the United States, his words were that it was “virtually
a certainty”. Perhaps these words carried much weight with
me since I’ve thought the same exact thing since September
11th.
The current situation about who knew what prior
to the attacks last September have truthfully gotten me pretty furious.
As much as I love to torture politicians at every turn, not even
the biggest weasel politician would have ever allowed the events
of 9/11 to occur if they knew they were going to happen. To see
any politician trying to make political hay out of the deaths of
over 3,000 innocent people is disgusting and despicable and they
should be ashamed of themselves. I’ll do them a favor and
not use their names.
Both the U.S. Senate and House Intelligent Committees
got the same EXACT briefing that George Bush received at his ranch
in Texas last August and nobody did anything about changing security
measures because the threat was vague, minimal and among many others.
If people want to debate whether the U.S. and world
intelligence agencies can communicate better, well that might be
an excellent thing to debate. In the meantime, the politicians should
conduct themselves in an honorable and decent way, and the journalists
who acted ridiculously and hysterically will need to rise even further
to regain any respect.
The following FAKE news story was forwarded to
me and I wanted to share it with you. I wish I had someone to attribute
it to because they deserve credit for some thoughtful writing since
it paints a pretty interesting picture of how different history
might have turned out.
CONGRESS SEEKS TO OUST BUSH FOLLOWING RACIAL
PROFILING, POLICE STATE MANEUVERS
September 2001
Washington, DC (XYZ Wire Service) - Congressional
leaders are scrambling to begin impeachment proceedings against
President George W. Bush following several unprecedented federal
security measures that critics say constitute an unconscionable
assault on American civil liberties. Wall Street, meanwhile, is
reeling from a seismic downturn while the airline industry is predicted
to topple.
The Bush administration's sudden imposition of
several new - some say "terrifying" - policies came on
the heels of an alleged FBI warning that radical Muslim terrorists
were planning to hijack U.S. commercial airliners. In the past 36
hours, Bush has taken several steps that have sent American citizens
and institutions into shock.
Federal officials have:
Detained and begun questioning about two dozen
aviation students who are of Arab or Middle Eastern descent, prompting
the Arab-American and Muslim communities to organize massive protests
in several cities.
Posted military personnel in airports and imposed
extensive personal searches that have forced long lines, delays
and charges of racial profiling as travelers who appear to be of
Middle Eastern descent have been targeted by security inspectors.
Ordered a tightening of borders and alerted immigration
personnel to be on the lookout for suspicious activities, especially
among Middle Easterners. As one TV pundit observed, there hasn't
been this much furor in the nation's capital since the days of Vietnam
War protesters. "This is insanity, this is an outrage,"
said Democratic leader Rep. Richard Gephardt on CNN's "Crossfire."
U.S. Rep. Cynthia McKinney, D-Ga., has charged
Bush with racial profiling. She has asked for an investigation into
the FBI report that prompted these measures, saying that the report
was too "vague" to justify any government action.
In a radio interview, McKinney suggested that the
Bush administration was fictionalizing a terrorist threat in order
to justify imposing his conservative domestic agenda on an unsuspecting
America. "I'm not saying he made it up; I'm just saying that
an investigation might show that he did," said McKinney.
Responding to such attacks, the White House is
urging Americans to be patient.
"We understand Americans' concern; President
Bush did not take these steps without careful consideration,"
said White House press secretary Ari Fleischer. "Given that
American lives were at stake, President Bush felt he had no choice."
The security threat to which Bush allegedly was
responding came in the form of a memo to the president during a
routine daily briefing while Bush was vacationing at his home in
Crawford, Texas. Bush had requested an intelligence analysis of
possible attacks by "al-Qaida," a radical Muslim terrorist
organization headed by a wealthy Saudi Arabian exile named Osama
bin Laden.
Bush specifically was interested in possible attacks
on American soil, as most intelligence reports previously had focused
on threats against U.S. targets overseas. Al-Qaida groups, which
operate as small cells, claimed responsibility for several attacks
on American targets during the Clinton administration. According
to White House sources, Bush was concerned that bin Laden and al-Qaida
had not been taken seriously enough during the previous administration.
The new report said that bin Laden followers might
seek to hijack U.S. airliners.
"So what?" demanded McKinney. "Since
when don't we know that terrorists might seek to hijack U.S. airliners?
It's cold in Alaska, too. Did anybody mention that?"
Fleischer noted during a press conference that
another FBI memo, written in July, mentioned that two students at
an Arizona flight school were thought to be linked to al-Qaida.
"President Bush merely connected the dots,"
said Fleischer. "When you have two possible al-Qaida members
training to fly airplanes in the U.S., combined with information
that bin Laden may be targeting American airliners, you can't just
hope nothing bad will happen. You have to act, and that's exactly
what the president did."
The Muslim American Society and The Council on
American Islamic Relations joined McKinney yesterday at a rally
in front of the Lincoln Memorial to demand Bush's impeachment.
"Just because two flight students are 'thought'
to be members of al-Qaida, Bush is rounding up Muslims?" McKinney
said at the rally. "Can anybody say, 'racial profiling'?
Bush will address the nation tonight at 8 on all
major networks. At 9 p.m. CNN's "Larry King Live" will
air a live interview with special guest Osama bin Laden.
A TRULY TERRIFIC DOCUMENTARY ON HBO
I’m obviously very sensitive about September
11th and the subject has crept into nearly every newsletter I’ve
written since that time. As much as I’ve avoided personally
visiting the Ground Zero area I have wanted someone to respectfully
document the events of that day.
There was a nicely done documentary shot by two
French brothers which was aired on CBS over a month ago. I watched
that and it contained footage you will not see anywhere else.
This past Saturday HBO began airing their one-hour
program, which I made sure I was able to sit and watch. All I can
say is that the program was extraordinary and I can offer nothing
but praise to HBO and the people involved in its production. I will
admit that I was thankful it was only 60 minutes in length since
I may not have been able to make it much longer than that. There
was a feeling in my stomach by the end that I’d taken a swift
kick there. If you can get HBO (or someone to tape it for you) I’d
suggest you watch it.
GET ME WILL SMITH!
Although I have always preferred Wall Street, the
way that Hollywood handles their finances has always fascinated
me. There is a very interesting new measure of “star power”
making its way through Hollywood these days and I thought you might
find as interesting as I did. It simply measures how much a star
costs to capture a viewer. The actual name of this measure is CPV
or Cost Per Viewer. For anyone who thinks Will Smith is ridiculously
overpaid at $20 million per movie (although I have heard that the
number was even higher for Men in Black II) he may actually be one
of Hollywood’s biggest bargains. Here are the new economics
for actors and entertainers based on how much they are paid for
each viewer they attract:
Halle Berry - $.36 per viewer
Greta Van Susteren - $.78 per viewer
Ray Romano - $.89 per viewer
Will Smith - $1.02 per viewer
Nicole Kidman - $1.15 per viewer
Tom Hanks - $1.19 per viewer
Julia Roberts - $1.46 per viewer
Mel Gibson - $1.81 per viewer
Russell Crowe - $1.88 per viewer
Katie Couric - $2.19 per viewer
Kelsey Grammer - $2.44 per viewer
Conan O’Brien - $3.14 per viewer
The Entire Cast of Friends - $4.86 per viewer
Larry King - $5.38 per viewer
Mariah Carey - $98.00 per viewer for Glitter
I FINALLY TELL YOU HOW TO GET VERY, VERY
RICH
This idea may sound goofy, but I actually wonder
what is being done, if anything, to prevent this from occurring.
I’m not even that smart but I would already have this idea
underway if I had any ability to make it happen.
The idea began when I read an article last week
in the Wall Street Journal about some cow in Cuba which died years
ago, but continues to hold the Guinness Book of World Records record
for most milk production in a single day. I think the cow actually
produced over 170 pounds of milk in one day. The article then brought
up the idea of potentially cloning this deceased cow in order to
increase milk production without needing to increase the size of
the herd. This, however, is not my idea for making you rich.
My idea is to clone Secretariat. It’s as simple as that.
I remember as a young man watching Secretariat
win the Triple Crown and thinking what a spectacular animal he was.
I grew up in a farming family and knew a little bit about animals
and you could see that he was a freak of nature where everything
had lined up for him genetically.
When the specter of cloning first arose I truthfully
thought is was a novelty with animals and a morbid possibility with
humans. I truthfully didn’t see any real business applications
for it. With mediocre thoroughbreds bringing a million dollars the
idea of cloning a Secretariat for each Triple Crown season is an
unbelievable thought to consider. If I owned the remains of Secretariat
I would already be cloning a couple of new ones for each racing
year from now until forever.
What I would be curious to hear from any of you
is whether or not thoroughbred racing has passed any regulations
regarding the cloning of horses. Cloning farm animals seems like
pretty routine stuff these days and there is nothing illegal about
it either. Let me know the rules and regulations if you know them.
ANOTHER BRAIN TEASER FOR YOU
I was actually quite startled by how many responses
I got last month regarding the brainteaser about the price of a
tulip. For those of you who couldn’t bring yourselves to ask
for the answer, the answer was $.21 for the tulip. The logic was
simply that each consonant costs $.05 and each vowel costs $.03,
which equals the twenty one cents.
This month’s teaser presents a bit more food
for thought, although I personally found it easier than last months.
“A boy went out to buy some fishing equipment.
He spent half of what he had plus $5.00 at the first store. At the
second, he spent half of what was left plus $4.00, and at the third
store he spent half of the remainder plus $3.00. He then had $5.00
left to put aside for bait. How much money did the boy start with?”
If you want the answer, just reply to this newsletter
and ask me for it. I’ll send it back to you via e-mail.
WEEKLONG PROGRAMS IN HARTFORD, CHICAGO,
LOS ANGELES, GRAND CAYMAN AND BERMUDA
We are trying something in the U.S. this year that
we have been doing for many years offshore, and that is host a weeklong
series of programs where each day is dedicated to a single topic.
Each subject is very timely given the current conditions of the
market and I have been extremely excited about the response. I will
be personally conducting each and every session and I would love
to see you and your colleagues in attendance.
For more information on course content or to register,
please visit:
http://www.afs-seminars.com/schedule.html
http://www.afs-seminars.com/cayman.html
http://www.afs-seminars.com/bermuda.html
Look out for next month’s issue, which I
am already doing my research for. I think you’re going to
enjoy it.
http://www.afs-seminars.com
Copyright 2002, Michael Gasior. All Rights Reserved.
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